“Jesus” refers to SUP or Stand Up Paddle. We’d say, for example, “making Jesus”.
Between two waves or seen from afar, the SUP rider seems to walk on water, which has earned him his nickname.
At first glance, SUP may seem more accessible than surfing: the difficulty of standing up in a hollow wave disappears, as the Jesus is already standing. What’s more, the extraordinary buoyancy of his machine enables him to start from a greater distance, while the wave is still relatively flat.
Nevertheless, without a minimum of local knowledge (wave placement and reading), the Jesus becomes a biblical scourge that descends on the little people of the waves. Indeed, the volume, weight and inertia of the SUP prevent the Jesus from moving quickly through the waves, and if he doesn’t have perfect control of his craft, it can fatally injure someone placed unwillingly in its path.
For safety reasons, it’s advisable to practice on calm water first, before trying your hand in the waves. For bird-watching, on the other hand, standing up is the best option. Stand Up Paddle champions were already very good surfers before they switched to Jesus.
You’d think that many Christian surfers would be seduced by the Jesus, but that’s not the case. In fact, Christians consider SUP practitioners to be false prophets, deceiving believers by demonstrating supernatural prowess (walking on water with a paddle). Excerpt from Holy Scripture: For there shall arise false christs and false prophets, working great wonders and miracles, to deceive even the elect, if it were possible.


